Emotional Unavailability.

Hey y'all !!!

I am back with another post. Hope you all are doing well. So, today's blog is about something that most of us would relate to, Emotional Unavailability.

Life can be a bit of a roller coaster, right?

Sometimes we find ourselves on the sidetracks where it gets tough to open up and let people in.
We all have our reasons for being a bit guarded sometimes. There’s this invisible force around us that stops us from having a heart-to-heart conversation with others. Attempting to do so is like trying to grab smoke with nothing but our bare hands.

Some of us may be really friendly and socially outgoing, but when it comes to the nitty gritty of feelings, we’re like, “Nope, not going there.” It’s like trying to play an emotional game of tag. We see someone reaching out to connect, but we’re so quick to dodge, trying to be a step ahead of them.
“All the vulnerable stuff is off-limits.”

This emotional unavailability shows up everywhere and with everyone. There’s no discrimination(at least we’re fair over here). The moment someone touches an uncomfortable serious discussion, we either deflect the conversation with a well-timed joke and change the subject or we go from being the life of the party to the party pooper.

As with the ripples on a placid pond, our mind travels further away from the crux of the dialogue the longer it goes on. It’s not that we don’t want the connection. We don’t know how to lower our defences. The very thing we need(emotional connection) is what we end up pushing away. All the mess resulting from the emotional dumpage of our feelings doesn’t feel worth it.

But hey, we’re all a work in progress. And it’s totally okay to take our time. Opening up doesn’t have to be a sprint; it’s more like a stroll. If there’s something from the past that has got us on high alert, it’s for good reason. It’s okay for us to take the time and space to figure it out. We cannot force an emotional connection with anyone. It feels like a leaking tap when it's forced — we’re continuously losing our precious time.

It takes a brave person to open up about their thoughts and feelings — rather close to giving someone a roadmap to understand us better. To show people what we really think and who we really are is a form of trust and vulnerability that is deeply admired because it’s rare.

But if we don’t feel like having a deep conversation or opening up, that’s fine. Let the people around you know what’s going on. It could be a simple, “Hey, I’m dealing with some stuff right now and I don’t feel like talking about it,” kind of thing. It helps manage expectations and people appreciate honesty.

You see, when we are emotionally distant, we start creating superficial relationships that lack emotional intimacy. We stand at a distance and struggle to allow ourselves to be fully seen and understood. We are present and yet, we are not. To have relationships in our lives that we can deeply value, we need to learn to trust and be trusted, to confide and to be confided in.

Nobody is perfect and we’re all a bit messy when it comes to emotions. We think that if we show our true emotions all the time, it’s a sign of weakness. But in reality, it is a strength that shows our authentic self, our inner world.

Going from emotionally unavailable to emotionally available is a tortoise’s race. There is no single moment that will break down the barrier of our emotional lockdown.

“Our better safe than sorry” attitude keeps us hiding in our protective shells but we need to leave home someday. So I hope that in our journey of being more emotionally involved, we learn to express ourselves, just a little bit more, every single day.

That's all from my side. Let me know your opinions by commenting, and I'll see you in the next blog. Until then, be safe, be happy, and be yourself.

Bye!!!